IM ALL ALONE AT HOME TILL MIDNIGHT!

THE DOOR JUST SLAMMED BEHIMD ME!

THERES NO WIND!

I CANT FIND MY TORCHLIGHT IN CASE IT BLACKS OUT!

I CANT FIND MATCHES OR CANDLES!

I DONT DARE TO GET THE KNIFE IN CASE SOME INVISIBLE THING COMES AND SLASHES ME!

IM A DEAD PERSON!

I WISH I WENT WITH MY FAMILY!

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today was fine

p.e was a killer

mwaha

OH MAN

I HEAR NOISES COMING FROM THE KITCHEN

MAYBE ITS A MADMAN SHARPENING HIS KNIFE

OH SHIT SOMEONE SAVE ME PLEASE!

mwaha

we have to write a fifty word essay on what we learnt from the softball tournament!

so amusing

haha

rmb the english funny signs?

i found some

by acci

At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?

At the entrance of the large machinery plant: Warning to young ladies: If you wear loose clothes, beware of the machinery. If you wear tight clothes, beware of the machinist.

Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.

Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: Hello. May we pick your nose?

In a Beauty Shop: Dye now!

In a cleaner’s window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.

In a dry cleaner's emporium: Drop your pants here.

In a New York restaurant: Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager

In a toilet: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

In a veterinarian’s waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!

Inside a bowling alley: Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop.Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on Labor Day.

On a butcher's window: Let me meat your needs.

On an electrician's truck: Let us remove your shorts.

Outside a photographer’s studio: Out to lunch; if not back by five, out for dinner.

Outside a second-hand store: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.